Mind Games

Last week, sitting on the acupuncture table, I expressed my frustration about my missed maintenance runs to my acupuncturist. She's also a marathoner, and she cocked her head and wondered out loud why I should worry about it. The rest of the conversation went something like this:

Me: What? I HAVE to get my runs in!
Her: Why? Have you missed them before?
Me: Umm . . . (sheepishly) yes.
Her: Did anything bad happen? Did you have a bad long run after or something?
Me: No.
Her: Why then are you worried about it?

She brought up a good point. There was NOTHING in my history of running that should make me think missing some runs would be terrible. Naturally, it's not ideal, but would it lessen any of the progress I've made up to this point? NO.

It was that damn gremlin again making me worry. I was playing mind games.

So then I had to ask myself, why do I run? Sure there are plenty of benefits: it's fun, I can eat whatever I like (to a degree), I stay healthy and strong, I release stress, etc. In the end though, what is it that gets me out the door with my running shoes on?

In trying to answer that question, I found myself browsing Runner's World and back to John Bingham and this article. This man is my running guru!

As part of my final performance project in grad school, I used an ad from NIKE. It said:

A WOMAN IS OFTEN MEASURED BY THE THINGS SHE CANNOT CONTROL.
SHE IS MEASURED BY THE WAY HER BODY CURVES OR DOESN'T CURVE, BY
WHERE SHE IS FLAT OR STRAIGHT OR ROUND.
SHE IS MEASURED BY 36-24-36 AND INCHES AND AGES AND NUMBERS, BY ALL THE OUTSIDE THINGS THAT DON'T EVER ADD UP TO WHO SHE IS ON THE INSIDE.
AND SO IF A WOMAN IS TO BE MEASURED LET HER BE MEASURED BY THE THINGS SHE CAN CONTROL, BY WHO SHE IS AND WHO SHE IS TRYING TO BECOME.
BECAUSE AS EVERY WOMAN KNOWS, MEASUREMENTS ARE ONLY STATISTICS.
AND STATISTICS LIE.

Granted, it's an advertisement (written by a woman, at least), but I did like what it had to say about being measured by who was trying to become. So my guru's comment on potential really rings true with me. I run to realize my potential - as an athlete and as a woman.

Of course, unlike my guru, I don't accept what each day brings as easily as he does. But I'm working on it with the help of my acupuncturist, Team Tegla, and friends. So instead of MIND GAMES I can have an OPEN MIND. And hopefully, like my guru says, my soul will win every time.