I'm BAAAAAAAAAAAAACK

No really. I am!

I am running regularly again. I even ran this morning after drinking margaritas last night. And it feels GOOD.

I am not distracted . . . well, that's not entirely true because I got a job that's taking me away from DC for a year . . . but the distractions are manageable enough to keep running. In fact, the running helps get rid of the panicky feeling I get regularly due to this new job. And Zoe has been running with me and though it is getting hotter, she seems okay with joining me for now, so we're getting out there three days a week.

So . . . hang in there with me one and all.

And forgive me for not running a marathon this year. I just can't make it happen. I was hoping to run Tucson, but the new job will make that travel difficult. So I think I'm going to focus on half marathons this fall. I might be able to make a spring marathon happen . . . time will tell. But for now I'm looking at the Chicago Half Marathon (maybe with my nephew and brother) and some other half marathons in the mid-west.

Don't despair . . . I'll run #7 in 2007.

Springing into Action

Today I ran down to the Lincoln Memorial and back. I'm guessing it was in the vicinity of a 10 mile run. It felt really good and it was a beautiful morning to be out and about in DC. I think spring has FINALLY, fully arrived.

Spring is the best time of year in DC. Hands down, the best. The weather is amazing - sunny but not hot and everything is in bloom. The cherry blossoms run their brief course and all of the trees are blossoming. I could smell the honeysuckle and other spring fragrances along my route. Just a glorious morning.

The National Mall was abuzz with student groups and tourists . . . and there were groups I believe rallying for immigration rights there, too, as well as a movie being shot! Yes, it seems when the weather improves, the city becomes more alive and exciting. Everybody is springing into action.

Even I was participating in my own small way. Running along the Mall path I joined other runners and walkers. In this weather, you see a lot more than your ususal die-hard runners outside and it's kind of nice. Spring brings with it promise and hope - promise of even warmer, sunnier days and time to play outside and the hope that new beginnings can create.

When I got home, I joined the kitty and dogs out back in the garden. My tulips are stunningly beautiful right now and it was so lovely to stretch in the sun and enjoy all the color around me. The kitty loves playing among the flowers and stalking the flies and bees. The dogs just enjoy sunning themselves. After stretching I sipped my green tea . . . I've given up coffee (another blog about THAT down the road) . . . and enjoyed my breakfast of yogurt and buckwheat pancakes (leftover from yesterday) with peanut butter and banana. Being able to spend the mornings in the garden now makes getting up less of a hardship. Not that I'm jumping out of bed with a smile on my face, mind you, but it is easier to run and I am happy to enjoy the sunshine and the flowers in my cool down.

And as the 1/2 marathon approaches, I have hope that the season will inspire me to spring into action more often!

Time Flies and Good-byes

So . . . two weeks have flown by and I am happy to say I have managed to get in some running. I ran 8 miles last weekend and probably the same this weekend.

I say probably because I was back on the boardwalk and increased my distance, but the mileage is just a guess as I only based it on time.

I've talked a great deal about time in this blog - from a runner's viewpoint. How is it different in the "real world?"

I'm not sure it is. I've noticed, as a runner, if I get caught up in my time then I tend to run less effectively. I think when I get caught up with time in my personal life, I live less effectively.

This weekend I was with the boy - our last weekend together until August as he must go away for work (What kind of work you ask? He could tell us but then he'd have to kill us - hahaha). I spent part of the weekend thinking about him being gone - for four months - and found myself not enjoying the fact that he was still there, with me, for the whole weekend.

Funny that.

I imagined how LONG four months will feel. How lonely I'll be. How much I'll miss him and how many fun things we'll miss.

I'm convinced that focusing on time only makes it go by that much slower. It does when I run - if I watch my watch. But if I just note the time when I leave and the time when I get back, I'm surprised by how fast it went by.

So in the real world I need to apply my running knowledge. I shouldn't "count the days" or they will feel like years. If I enjoy my time with friends, running, work, etc. the four months will race by. And before I know it, good-bye will be hello.

On the Boardwalk

Yesterday, I ran on the boardwalk at Ocean City. What a spectacular morning! What a spectacular weekend!

What a tease, really though. By week's end it might snow says my co-worker and arm chair meteorologist. At least I got my running in - not one but two mornings.

Of course, I spoke to my brother today and he's running about 4 - 5 days/week. ACK. I'm positively sloth-like in my approach to this 1/2 marathon by comparison. SIGH. Well, to each his own.

There's something special about running on the beach. The sound of the waves is soothing and manages to boost me up with its tireless motion. Depending on where you run, there truly is "no finish line" as ahead of you is always room to run. Most times, there is a breeze to keep you cool. Time ceases to exist in that environment and when you've finished, you marvel at how EASY it was to run your distance.

Zoe ran with me - she loves running on the beach, too. There are seagulls to chase, waves to swim in, and sand to roll on. She becomes a puppy again where we're seaside.

Perhaps that's it for me, too. The beach is a place (regardless of PLACE) that reminds me of my childhood. Many summer days were spent on the New Hampshire coast playing in the sea and sand and goofing off at the boardwalk. So perhaps all of my mental and emotional images of the beach are joyful and care-free (or BAGGAGE FREE).

Of course running is easy when you're feeling LIGHT and JOYFUL. So it's time to embrace the boardwalk in all of my running routes.

Best Times

One of Team Tegla forwarded this to me yesterday. I was surprised I hadn't read it myself, yet, but was so happy to have taken my own trip down memory lane.

Like John Bingham, I had a "best time" in Honolulu - just in a different way. I went my fabulous friends, ran with my terrific teammates, surfed, sailed, ate and drank on probably the best vacation I've ever had. All this with no official time result to due a malfunctioning chip. And yet, I had a BEST TIME.

As I learn to embrace running as a life-style instead of something I have to do, I find this trip down memory lane to be a great reminder of what racing can be for me. FUN.

I'm happy to say I ran today. I didn't have to, but I did. It felt great - in spite of the chilly air the sun was shining, Zoe joined me quite happily, and I even managed a few chipper hellos to fellow runners. Normally, I'm lucky to raise my hand in a little wave. Why the change? I don't know. Perhaps my attitude adjustment has commenced. Perhaps I'm learning to embrace running as a ZEN experience instead of needing to prove or accomplish something.

So hopefully this is the beginning of my "training." And will lead to many more "best times."

Life's Little Problems

It has been a tough day - and it's not even noon yet.

Nothing SERIOUS has happened, but just little things that upset and chip away at my feeling able and willing to be an adult. I just want to crawl back into bed . . . or better yet grab Zoe, get in the car and escape.

Oh, but wait . . . that implies I have a car that's safe to drive. Nope. I took it in for an oil change and to have them check the brakes (there was an ominous scraping sound happening when I was driving). I just got the call and it will be at least $1000.00 to fix. Ummm . . . where will THAT come from? SIGH. Thank heavens for credit cards.

This was the straw that broke the camel's back today.

All I wanted was a cup of coffee. So I vigorously scrub the months of crud that has built up on the work coffee pot, prepare the machine to brew, and turn it on. About 10 minutes later I go to fill my coffee mug and there are grounds EVERYWHERE. So much for my cup of joe. And I have the fun task of vigorously scrubbing the pot (and everything within a six inch radius) again.

I realize my problems don't amount to "rice for refugees" as a friend of mine likes to say. I was able to go get a cup of coffee on the other side of the building for heavens sake. At least I have credit cards I can use and eventually pay off the brakes on my 12 year old car. But some days these little problems seem so HUGE. Coffee should be simple. My car should work. The things I take for granted.

And of course I'm sure I don't deal well with the little problems when I'm not running. And I'm not running. I ran six on Saturday but I cannot seem to get my lazy butt out during the week for my maintenance runs. WHY? WHY AM I GETTING IN MY OWN WAY?

My newest edition of Runner's World arrived. I see the perfect woman on the cover and sigh.

My brother e-mailed me yesterday. A well-intentioned e-mail saying, basically, "I'm on track with my training." In fact, his training is now going BETTER than mine. UGH.

HELP!

I'm cranky, sedentary, frustrated, and beginning to worry. So in my search for some motivation I return to John Bingham and read this. He's right, you know. Perhaps I'm not truly a runner yet because I'm feeling I HAVE to run right now. It's time for an attitude adjustment. It's time to get out of bed because I DON'T HAVE to. It's time to think of running in a new way . . . time to embrace running for no reason at all.

And then maybe life's little problems will melt away.

MIA

Hello darling family, dear friends, devoted fans, and complete strangers!

Yes, I have been MIA. And that may be how it remains for just a little bit longer. I don't intend to stay away for good . . . just until the boy leaves for the big blue.

I did want to give a brief update, however.

I ran six miles on Saturday. I continue to get to Pilates and continue to fail to get to Yoga. Little change there but I have high hopes that things will get back to something more normal beginning next month.

The biggest news is that our little menagerie at the Pink House has expanded AGAIN. My housemate found a stray dog in the neighborhood last week and after papering the neighborhood with signs, calling shelters and the Humane Society, and asking around the hood we are certain "Hannah" is now a member of our odd little family. She is my housemate's responsibility, of course, but I am thrilled to be able to help. She is a darling shepherd-mix - very timid and sweet - and I believe she's finally relaxing and feeling more at home. My friends joke that word is getting out to the stray community that the Pink House is the place to go! So we are up to 3 dogs and one kitty who is rapidly becoming a cat.

The dogs all get along just fine. Kitty is not pleased with the new arrival however. Every time she passes the study, Hannah's current safe place, she hisses. It's damn funny actually. I believe she will accept Hannah eventually - or at the very least learn to live with her - so I'm not at all concerned.

Of course between the boy, the weather, and the new dog (which I walk in the mornings with Zoe) my running during the week is suffering. I'm trying to figure out how to change that and so far have not figured out the best way to get my maintenance mileage in. SIGH. I refuse to stress about it at this point.

So expect me to be MIA for just a little bit longer.

Swollen

Blech.

Today I'm feeling really swollen. It's a yucky feeling. I didn't run over the weekend with my group. In fact, over the past week, I got right back out of the saddle I had just gotten back into!

I blame a boy - a boy I've been "seeing". It's not that he doesn't want me to run, it's just that in about a month he'll be gone for four months so I'm feeling a need to spend as much time with him as possible. Sometimes that means going away for the weekend. In fact, it often means going away for the weekend. And that means I miss the group run.

Of course, I can't explain why I'm not getting the maintenance runs in. This morning it was raining. Is that good enough?

Today I'm feeling a bit cranky about it all because I really do not want to lose the momentum I started. I'm officially signed up for the Kentucky Derby Half Marathon in April and am still seriously considering the Midnight Sun Marathon in June so I really NEED to get my body moving! Of course, once the boy has gone to sea (seriously folks), I will have my weekends completely free . . . and most of my weeknights.

ECAG asked how I manage to run on a theatre schedule. I laughed out loud . . . only because I haven't had a theatre schedule since the summer! Granted, it's tricky. I trained for my first marathon while playing Ophelia at a theatre two hours away. Don't ask me how I managed to get up on a Sunday morning at 5AM to run 15 or more miles in the heat on only four hours of sleep. I honestly don't know how I did it - I just did.

So what's my problem now???

My acupuncturist says winter is the time of hybernation . . . that the body wants the extra pounds (lordy, I went to the doctor yesterday and about choked when I was weighed - don't get me wrong, I'm only six pounds heavier than usual, but it's all about how you feel) and resists hard workouts. She thought the yoga was very good . . . and I do, too . . . as a balance . . . except that I can't seem to get THERE either!

It is said it takes two weeks to get into a habit so all I need to do is set my alarm for two weeks and even if I'm away for the weekend I must take my running shoes. How hard can that be?!

SIGH. Apparently pretty hard.

Well, what must be done must be done. And if it can keep me from feeling swollen like this again, set that alarm and roll out that yoga mat!

Back in the Saddle

WHEW! So I took a break from running and writing and now I'm back. You've been warned. :)

Team Tegla met last Saturday for the first time since the marathon and we ran an "easy" six. I put easy in quotes because the wind was blowing something FIERCE and it felt like we were pushing against a brick wall through much of the run. I really don't like the wind. We're running again this Saturday (8 miles) and hopefully the weather will cooperate!

I also managed to get in my maintenance runs this week - even Zoe joined me! Monday's run wasn't much fun - I was sore from Saturday and my yoga class on Sunday - but I did it and had a much better run yesterday.

Yes, you read correctly. I have now made time for YOGA on Sundays and have also signed up for a PILATES class on Thursdays so hopefully my strength and flexibility will increase.

I e-mailed my brother today and it looks as if we'll for certain be running the Kentucky Derby 1/2 marathon in April. I'm very happy too that he is interested in running the race WITH me . . . so we're both hoping for a 2 hour or under race. Should be fun!

Now . . . for the next MARATHON.

ECAG has really done it and doesn't even know it. My friends in Team Tegla are seriously considering running the Mayor's Midnight Sun Marathon in Anchorage, June 17, 2006! Much depends on money - how much we have or don't have by then - but we are thinking in terms of that for our next race. May as well run marathons in the 49th and 50th state back to back, right?

Otherwise, no decisions have been made for the next 26.2 . . . and I'm really okay with that. I'm just happy to be back in the saddle - or back in my running shoes - again.

New Year's Resolutions

Happy New Year! Yup, it's the start of a new year . . . clean slate, new beginnings, fresh start, etc. It's the time for RESOLUTIONS.

Or IS it?

Frankly, I believe resolutions set you up to fail. I used to believe in making them and at the end of each year I'd kick myself for not following through.

A friend of mine made the astute comment that many resolutions come in a negative form: I will quit smoking, I won't eat sweets, etc. And they tend to be black or white - no wiggle room for life throwing you a curve ball and subsequently making the follow through that much harder.

So instead of making resolutions this year I have made a wish. I had the good fortune to spend New Year's in Ocean City with a friend and on January 1st, I walked along the beach and made a wish. My wish - unrelated to peace on earth, a healthy planet, and happiness for my family and friends - my PERSONAL, SELFISH wish is to let go of the outcome on things in my life: auditions, other jobs, love-life, marathons (or other races) and the like. This is not to say I won't plan, and hope, and work. It's just to say that life has a funny way of not turning out the way you want it to so why hold out for an outcome about which you have no control? Instead, I wish to be open to whatever gifts the universe sends my way.

And when I look back at 2005, the universe sent an abundance of gifts my way:
- enough work as an actor to pay my insurance
- new friends and lots of fun times with old friends
- a summer fling and a winter "not-sure-yet-what-to-call-it"
- a new home in a fabulous pink house
- good health and my sixth marathon
- a trip to Hawaii!

And that's only a sampling of all the great things that came my way last year.

So here's to 2006 and all of its potential gifts without the resolutions. Cheers.